Tis the end for thee, so I must bid thee goodbye Mitt Romney…

…you won’t be missed. I will be working the polls all day tomorrow for this most momentous election. I find that I am more excited for this one then I was when I did the same thing in 2008. So in the face of Obama’s pretty much assured victory, never mind what the talking heads say, I thought it wise to make my farewells now to a truly unworthy opponent.

So here’s to you Willard “Mitt” Romney, one of the most craven, corrupt, dishonest, despicable, pathetic, and  egregious excuses for man or politician I have ever been exposed to in my life.

These are some of the things I will most remember you for:

1)    Binders full of women

2)    Etch a Sketch

3)    “Corporations are people, my friend.”

4)    A VP candidate with beefcake photos

5)    Making yourself extra tan for you town hall on Telemundo

6)    Buddying up to “rape babies are a gift from God” Murdoch

7)    Fake storm Sandy relief events that were really campaign stops **wink wink nudge nudge**

8)    Blundering and blustering your way through Europe

9)    Newt Gingrich’s scathing film about you and Bain capital

10) Your extremely shy tax returns

11) Ryan washing clean pots at a soup kitchen –honestly he’s almost as bad as you. Great choice!

12) Not believing in the same thing from one day to the next and then denying you ever believed it – You have always been at war with Oceania

13) Your ability to lie so easily and with such conviction

14) Your stepping in a Benghazi cowpie

     


You may have been good for laugh at times, your robotic delivery and stilted mannerisms always were good for that, but the thought of you actually running this country brings an absolute chill to my spine. You who would privatize Social Security and Medicade to non-existence leaving once and future generations to shrift for themselves. You who does not believe in climate change. You whose first priority is to your weird religion. You who gets hard just thinking about bombing Iran no matter how many must die for your hubris. You who would disenfranchise those of a different color, women, and sexual orientation then you. You who would increase defense spending at the expense of schools and poor folk. You who would drag all the tea bag loonies and religious nuts that you have had to pander to with you to the White House. You who thinks its okay to pay no taxes while shifting the tax burden to the rest of us. You who think that 47% of Americans are useless leeches.

But in the end it is you and your ilk that are the parasites. You and the other vultures who have for the last 30 years striven to take without any thought to those you take from as long as profit is involved. You sir are a disgrace to the office of the Presidency and worse than Bush, which is something I never thought I’d say. I hope when this is over you will finally slink away back to the dark recesses to which you belong and take your repellent wife and 5 sons with you. It would be a great day to never have to lay eyes on your clipart visage again. Unless that is to see you marched away in handcuffs from all your dirty dealings coming to light. I’d watch that all day long.

When I come home tomorrow night to celebrate Obama’s victory with friends and Champagne, I will take a moment to honor your campaign and pour a flat diet cola out on the curb.